I worked even harder to fit the description of how I was viewed. What I couldn’t understand was this made me more an imposter.Read More
In order to diffuse our innate fears of Muslims, I know of no force more powerful than that of face-to-face interaction. For those who haven’t already, it’s time to consider befriending a Muslim.Read More
Growing up, I always knew I was different. I did anything I could to conform, to be like the mainstream, to blend in. I looked successful. But over time, I realized I couldn’t keep it up. I wanted to be authentic.
If, like me, you've felt trapped by cultural expectations, here are tools and strategies that helped me overcome my cultural bonds. I believe that if these things helped me, they can definitely empower you.Read More
We all know this pain: our thoughts or emotions tell us two separate things. Yet our brains prefer simplicity at the expense of wholeness, so we continue invalidating ourselves.
Here is one way we can have peace with complexity and find the middle path.Read More
I didn’t know his name a week ago. But I said yes, the way I would put my body between my own five-year-old and an oncoming car.
When I think about Jesus… Maybe, when he didn’t know where to begin, he focused in on a single life, a single need, a single name.
His name is Engel.Read More
Looking at my own internal paradoxes lately: the enlightened feminist world-changer who also passes some standard baseline desirability test. Clearly, two halves of me are at war.
Here's how I breathe life back into my objectified bones…Read More
A lot can be learned from the leaves on the forest floor. Lean into the in-between places and uncertain spaces. Embrace this journey as cyclical rather than linear. There is new air all around you – breathe it in.Read More
Like a dry sponge I soaked up the radical teachings of Jesus. The more extreme I became, the more approval I received. I was a rock star.
It all began to unravel in about the third year…Read More
My mother was going to do her mother’s hair for the final time. I volunteered to be there to support her. What happened in that mortuary was truly cathartic.Read More
I lived with a dying mom in my most formative years, and afterward, raging fear of the death I had seen controlled my mind. But the only thing worse than death is being alive but not really living, and God never fails to whisper me back.Read More
From the personal moments that reopen old wounds to collective experience of the pain of strangers, we all confront the paradoxes of tragedy. And while I can’t promise you it will get better, I can promise to navigate these paradoxes together.Read More
This, now, is the rage and the darkness— this, here in the river. And we are all of us going deeper. One by one, we will offer ourselves, we will stand in the river, we will brave the current…
Because we belong to love.
As America struggled for the first time toward the stars, a newly elected president spoke to the world in gracious words and generous aspirations. Could we be that America again?Read More
Is it madness to march in the streets one year later, when it feels like so little has changed? The human soul cannot live in a constant state of grim battle.
But we march to know we’re not alone.Read More
The moment I knew I couldn’t be both a psychologist and a Christian, I was handing a heroin-dealing child molester a box of tissues.
Hamartia was the word I was missing.Read More
The church, you see, had been both a home to us and a place we'd been exiled from. Still, we felt this pull, an agony really, to keep her alive. If the doors kept swinging shut on us, we'd be the damn doorkeepers ourselves. Maybe it was a bit haughty of us, definitely a little audacious, and most assuredly dangerous. What if we too became irresponsible doorkeepers? What if in our eagerness to become a place of healing for the wounded, we only inflicted more wounds?Read More
I feel simple. I feel alive. Each moment I look, I see the shifting of the emptiness. I can’t stop staring at it now. Where I once saw darkness, I now see colors. Deep reds and purples. Glistening flesh constantly moving. It folds over itself many times. It shifts. It writhes. It contracts and expands.Read More
But gradually, it dawned on me: everyone speaking there looked just like me. Straight white men. I had a platform— not because of insights, or gifts, or passion— but because I fit the profile. And what about those who didn't? Every time I spoke, I realized, others were paying a cost in the sacrifice of their own powerful insights, gifts, and passions. We were all being impoverished by the loss.Read More
Today, the Sunday before Good Friday, the last Sunday of Lent. The last look inward before all is lost and all is gained even more. Today, in this deep search inward, we dedicated our children. In the midst of this incredible community of misfits we stood with our family and promised to raise our children in love and grace. None of this is easy. None of this is what I expected. All of this is what I needed.Read More
So I put myself back together. Piece by piece, I recovered parts of myself that I had shunned from the very beginning of my self-awareness. Yes, I am queer. And that's okay. Yes, I do want kids someday. And that's okay, too. No, I cannot do it all. And that is just fine. No, I do not have all the answers. And I shouldn't have to. Slowly, I redefined myself in my own image, rather than those of the people around me. I became me.Read More